Holy Angry English Major, Batman!

Okay, friends, you’re about to be treated to some Rage Blogging. It’s probably not a good idea to blog while mad, but I’m going to anyways. When The Muse calls with an idea, you’ve gotta roll with it. The Muse is kind of like the Commissioner Gordon to my Batman. Gordon never stops to think, “is now a good time to shine the Batsignal? Maybe Batman is sleeping or otherwise unavailable.” Nope. He lights that sucker up and expects a response RIGHT AWAY.

I’m sure Batman enjoys suiting up and seeking some vigilante style justice most of the time. But I’m also sure there are times when he’d look out a window and see that Batsignal in the sky and think “seriously? The city needs me NOW?! I was about to start binge watching The Golden Girls.” (You know underneath his many layers of rage and hatred that he has a softer side. No one can resist Betty White. NO ONE.) But still he suits up and goes into battle, because that’s what Batman does.

Such is life when you’re a writer. The Muse suddenly lights up your brain with an idea and you have to respond or else. It’s frustrating sometimes, but that’s the way it is.

Anyways, back to the point. I’m rage blogging today. And why am I rage blogging, you ask? Because Facebook is getting on my English major nerves.

Oh, you didn’t know I had nerves specific to my college major? Well I do. Let me explain how that works. You’re probably thinking it relates to grammar, right? Partially. I’m really not that big of a grammar freak. My degree is in English literature, not language. In other words, if you misuse a comma now and again, no big deal. But try to tell me that books are stupid and have no deeper meaning and I. WILL. FIGHT. YOU.

(That being said, there are certain grammar mixups that will activate the rage. Improper use of your and/or you’re is one such trigger.)

But you know what really gets me riled up? When people do not check sources.

“Amy, is that an English major thing?” you ask.

Hell yes it is. The English Major Book of Law, chapter 33, page 215, paragraph 7 states “all sources must be thoroughly documented with appropriate in text citations and painfully long references on the works cited page indicating the name of the work, page number cited, name(s) of author(s), font size, font style used, time you read the work, what you last ate before writing this paper, and any and all other bits of information your professor wants you to hunt down. And should you neglect to present this works cited page in the proper double spaced format with 12 point Times New Roman font with perfectly measured 1.5 inch margins, may God have mercy on your plagiarizing soul, you shameless hussy” (Snobbington 127).

(Obviously I made up The English Major Book of Law. But even though I received my Bachelor’s of English over 12 years ago, I still fear the wrath of the English department enough to make up a citation.)

“Whoa, Amy, you have English major issues,” you say.

No I don’t! I care about responsible scholarship and protecting ideas and…okay…now I’m arguing with myself. This is bad. I need more Dr. Pepper.

Getting back to the point (again) do I expect people to present a works cited page whenever they share something on social media? No. That would be crazy (but also kinda cool.)

What I *do* expect is for people to use common sense and not fall into the trap of using Picture Sources. What do I mean by that, you ask? Think about your newsfeed for a moment. Do you see people sharing lots of quotes? Some are inspirational, some are argumentative, some are just corny. Most of these quotes are accompanied by a picture. The picture is usually of the person who supposedly uttered the quote being shared.

And that is what passes for citing sources in the world of social media.

Repeat after me, people — pictures do not equal sources! Juxtaposing words over your favorite celebrity does not mean s/he said the quote in question!

*starts to simmer down*

*gets another idea*

Maybe I need to cash in on this idea. People seem to love photos of The Cat. Maybe I need to start putting pictures of her with some inspirational quotes and see if the interwebs will bite. I think The Cat would enjoy being a celebrity. This could work.

But I will resist the urge to fill my newsfeed with non-blog nonsense. I still fear the wrath of the gods of English literature threatening to smite me with the English Major Book of Law. I do have more thoughts on social media and how to survive it, but that will have to be another blog post. Tune in next week for more ramblings. Same Bat time. Same Bat channel.